Hey guys..
It's been a while..
I've wanted to write, but I haven't been moved to write in a while. I can't quite put into words everything that I've been experiencing with God. This journey with God is awesome. So, just let this be a postcard from my journey. I hope you are enjoying your own personal journey with Jesus. Check out this video and be blessed.
The Biggest Lie in Your Life
Thursday, March 31, 2011
Thursday, March 10, 2011
Everything means EVERYTHING
This has definitely been a week of journeying. It included some back tracking, some back sliding and some getting back on track. As the week began I was feeling pretty good about the journey. It had been nearly 40 days and I was feeling delivered from some of the sins that I had struggled with for so long. And then I fell. I found myself right back in the very pit that I had just climbed out of. I felt horrible.
And therein lies part of the problem. I felt.
I'd been gaging my growth on how I felt. If I felt empowered then I thought I was doing well. I hadn't surrendered anything to God. I had simply decided to refrain from certain activities. Yes, I've been praying more and in my Word and listening to sermons. But it's been a journey of convenience still. Transformation requires surrender. Surrendering everything. My identity, relationships, dreams, hopes, desires, opinions, EVERYTHING. I Peter 5:6-11 says:
5And he that sat upon the throne said, Behold, I make all things new. And he said unto me, Write: for these words are true and faithful.
6And he said unto me, It is done. I am Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end. I will give unto him that is athirst of the fountain of the water of life freely.
7He that overcometh shall inherit all things; and I will be his God, and he shall be my son.
8But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.
God's desire isn't to make us feel better, but to make us new. And that newness isn't limited to just us but EVERYTHING that concerns us. Psalm 138:8 says:
8 The LORD will perfect that which concerns me;
Your mercy, O LORD, endures forever;
Do not forsake the works of Your hands.
The initial process of surrendering everything to God isn't going to feel good. [please note that this message is for me as much as it is for you.] Praying and reading the Word and going to church are part of it. But that's like the strength training and conditioning; yes, it will strengthen and empower you to take action, but you still have to do something. You still have to surrender and submit. Personally, as I reflect I think I somehow got the idea that by praying and reading the Word and being in church and fasting I could somehow change myself or handle my burdens. I thought that these practices had given me some super human abilities to do what only God can do. When in actuality it's praying, reading the Word, fellowshipping with others at church, engaging in praise and worship, and fasting.. these practices, develop the fortitude within you to complete the assignment of submitting to the will of God. These practices do not make us God, but it builds up our spirit so that we are empowered to exercise our faith and trust God with everything.
And therein lies part of the problem. I felt.
I'd been gaging my growth on how I felt. If I felt empowered then I thought I was doing well. I hadn't surrendered anything to God. I had simply decided to refrain from certain activities. Yes, I've been praying more and in my Word and listening to sermons. But it's been a journey of convenience still. Transformation requires surrender. Surrendering everything. My identity, relationships, dreams, hopes, desires, opinions, EVERYTHING. I Peter 5:6-11 says:
6Humble yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God, that he may exalt you in due time:
7Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you.
8Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour:
9Whom resist stedfast in the faith, knowing that the same afflictions are accomplished in your brethren that are in the world.
10But the God of all grace, who hath called us unto his eternal glory by Christ Jesus, after that ye have suffered a while, make you perfect, stablish, strengthen, settle you.
11To him be glory and dominion for ever and ever. Amen.
I was too proud to give it all to God. To "cast all my cares upon Him." The process of humbling yourself requires that you take off your superman/superwoman cape and put everything that you've been carrying in the capable hands of God. It's a process of submitting to God. He wants everything. He wants to exalt (raise) us up, but not with us clinging to things that will weigh us down, or cause us to fall. Anything that we have to sustain on our own will cause us to fall. If we can't trust God to sustain our identity or a relationship or career or dream, then sooner or later the burden of trying to sustain it on our own will cause us to fall. And when we fall, our adversary the devil is waiting to pounce on and devour us.
The awesome thing about God is that He is more than able to sift through those things that we are trying to sustain and balance our load. Somethings we were never meant to carry others are expired and others we have simply mis-prioritized and the weight distribution is causing us to stumble and fall. But He know exactly what we should be carrying and how we should carry it. And He can sustain us and everything that He has placed in our lives for us to carry. But first we have to give Him everything so that He can fix our load and renew us. Revelations 21:4-8 says:
4And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away.
5And he that sat upon the throne said, Behold, I make all things new. And he said unto me, Write: for these words are true and faithful.
6And he said unto me, It is done. I am Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end. I will give unto him that is athirst of the fountain of the water of life freely.
7He that overcometh shall inherit all things; and I will be his God, and he shall be my son.
8But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.
God's desire isn't to make us feel better, but to make us new. And that newness isn't limited to just us but EVERYTHING that concerns us. Psalm 138:8 says:
8 The LORD will perfect that which concerns me;
Your mercy, O LORD, endures forever;
Do not forsake the works of Your hands.
The initial process of surrendering everything to God isn't going to feel good. [please note that this message is for me as much as it is for you.] Praying and reading the Word and going to church are part of it. But that's like the strength training and conditioning; yes, it will strengthen and empower you to take action, but you still have to do something. You still have to surrender and submit. Personally, as I reflect I think I somehow got the idea that by praying and reading the Word and being in church and fasting I could somehow change myself or handle my burdens. I thought that these practices had given me some super human abilities to do what only God can do. When in actuality it's praying, reading the Word, fellowshipping with others at church, engaging in praise and worship, and fasting.. these practices, develop the fortitude within you to complete the assignment of submitting to the will of God. These practices do not make us God, but it builds up our spirit so that we are empowered to exercise our faith and trust God with everything.
Sunday, March 6, 2011
I wasn't expecting this
Have you ever started out on a trip somewhere and become utterly surprised along the way? Perhaps you had printed out mapquest directions or put the address in your gps, had your oil changed, checked your tires, you've told everyone when you'll be arriving and made plans for once you get there. You got on your way and then a few hours into your drive the unexpected occurs. It could be a flat tire, car trouble, you left your wallet at the last gas stop and didn't realize it until you were trying to fill up again, sunny skies turn gray and you can't see more than a 2 feet ahead of you, there's a horrible accident that ties up traffic for 3 hours, you're in the horrible accident, there's road work, the road is closed and you have to detour, you get the point. Well, I'm not sure why I was expecting this spiritual journey to be as predictable as a run to the grocery store.
Today is day 34 and I've encountered all of those issues and then some. Where shall I start...
I was just reading over my earlier posts and everyday that I don't post I'm tempted to feel condemned because in my first post I made the statement that I'd post everyday for the first 40 days. Now ain't that just like the devil to try to make you feel about something you're doing for God? Craziness. All God said was seek me and be transparent. It's a trick of satan to try and turn your spiritual transformation and relationship with God into some legalistic exercise. And it was slipping in on my journey. Which brings me to another point- motive, but we'll come back to that later.
If you're anything like me, you may be a little impetuous. You hear the first part of instructions, get excited and move forward full steam ahead without making sure you've heard everything or understood properly. My antsy-ness has often been to my detriment. When God started speaking to me about a month ago about seriously submitting to His process to unleaven my life, I heard part of what He said and I mixed it with part of what I thought sounded good. But trust, God isn't going to tell you the entire travel plan at once and send you on your way alone. As He says in Habukkuk 2:2-3, God gives us a vision of the destination. The vision is to encourage us while we're on the journey. I've been guilty of misusing the vision; rather than referring to it as a promise that God has waiting for me as a result of obeying Him, at times I've taken the vision and told God, thanks for the great idea, but I think I know a better way to get there. And so, then I set off trying to chart my own course to a destination that He has showed me. The problem is that apart from following His direction every step of the way, not only will I not arrive at the destination, but the destination may not even come into existence. There could be something in the instructions that He plans on laying before me that will trigger the vision to be built, but if I'm assuming that it already exists and that I know how to get there. I'm way off and will never get to what He has in store.
I started out on this journey expecting that I could "do this" that it was all a matter of simply decided to make the right choices. But what I've found out it is I can't do anything, including making the right choices, without first being led by God for the entire journey. It's easy to become more motivated by attaining the vision or promise than loving God. I've been guilty of doing so. How do I know? because I'd do anything except obey Him to obtain the vision. I did things my way. Just like disobeying the rules of the road and detour signs can delay your arrival to a destination, dismissing the importance of obeying God will delay your arrival to the promise that God has for us.
Today is day 34 and I've encountered all of those issues and then some. Where shall I start...
I was just reading over my earlier posts and everyday that I don't post I'm tempted to feel condemned because in my first post I made the statement that I'd post everyday for the first 40 days. Now ain't that just like the devil to try to make you feel about something you're doing for God? Craziness. All God said was seek me and be transparent. It's a trick of satan to try and turn your spiritual transformation and relationship with God into some legalistic exercise. And it was slipping in on my journey. Which brings me to another point- motive, but we'll come back to that later.
If you're anything like me, you may be a little impetuous. You hear the first part of instructions, get excited and move forward full steam ahead without making sure you've heard everything or understood properly. My antsy-ness has often been to my detriment. When God started speaking to me about a month ago about seriously submitting to His process to unleaven my life, I heard part of what He said and I mixed it with part of what I thought sounded good. But trust, God isn't going to tell you the entire travel plan at once and send you on your way alone. As He says in Habukkuk 2:2-3, God gives us a vision of the destination. The vision is to encourage us while we're on the journey. I've been guilty of misusing the vision; rather than referring to it as a promise that God has waiting for me as a result of obeying Him, at times I've taken the vision and told God, thanks for the great idea, but I think I know a better way to get there. And so, then I set off trying to chart my own course to a destination that He has showed me. The problem is that apart from following His direction every step of the way, not only will I not arrive at the destination, but the destination may not even come into existence. There could be something in the instructions that He plans on laying before me that will trigger the vision to be built, but if I'm assuming that it already exists and that I know how to get there. I'm way off and will never get to what He has in store.
I started out on this journey expecting that I could "do this" that it was all a matter of simply decided to make the right choices. But what I've found out it is I can't do anything, including making the right choices, without first being led by God for the entire journey. It's easy to become more motivated by attaining the vision or promise than loving God. I've been guilty of doing so. How do I know? because I'd do anything except obey Him to obtain the vision. I did things my way. Just like disobeying the rules of the road and detour signs can delay your arrival to a destination, dismissing the importance of obeying God will delay your arrival to the promise that God has for us.
Monday, February 28, 2011
Rise, Shine and Win!
In sports there's nothing like getting a W to motivate you keep training for the next game. Well, your spiritual walk is the same. When you overcome in area that has in the past been a stronghold, it propels you to move forward and keep up the winning streak.
Today has been that kind of day for me. It started with not hitting snooze for an hour. I actually got up and got my day started as planned. I got in a great workout and got to hear a great message on tv while at the gym. I even had time to make breakfast and get to work on time. Most days I end up oversleeping and sometimes being as much as an hour late for work. And even though I slept late on those days, I would still sputter through the day feeling tired and making poor food choices because I didn't take the time to plan properly. Today, by contrast, I've had more energy than I've had in weeks. It was the win that I needed to motivate me to keep practicing and getting more wins in this area. Ironically, the message this morning on Kenneth Copeland's show was on nutrition and fitness and how as believers we have to be good stewards of our bodies. It's easy to think that the body is just superficial and believe that God is only concerned with our spirit. But we have to remember he put us here to work; actual real physical work. And we need to be in shape and fit to do all that He has called us to do. We're His tools, we've got to be in top working order.
This early morning victory over slothfulness, propelled me to more spiritual victories today. Because my mind was alert and had received the Word early this morning, it was ready for battle when the enemy came at me with a barrage of negative thoughts. I never realized how important being mentally alert is when it comes to battling these attacks. Imagine that you're half sleep or just woke up and someone comes up at punches you. Because of your drowsy state, you'd be totally caught off guard and knocked out. Well, that's how I've been spending so much time. In a drowsy stooper. And when satan would through negative thoughts my way, I'd get knocked out by them because I wasn't alert enough to fight back.
There are so many scriptures in the Bible that tells us to remain alert so that we don't fall into satan's traps, or miss God. In Matthew 13, Jesus talks about staying up and watchful because you don't know when He will return. I'm convinced that you can't be spiritually alert if your physically lethargic. You can be physically at rest and spiritually alert. But to be tired and drowsy your mind is no longer focused on anything spiritual your only thinking about meeting your need for rest. When we're alert we won't be caught off guard, we're ready to use the Word to fight satan rather than getting sucker punched.
Well, I've gotta get my rest, so I can rise, shine and WIN again tomorrow!
Today has been that kind of day for me. It started with not hitting snooze for an hour. I actually got up and got my day started as planned. I got in a great workout and got to hear a great message on tv while at the gym. I even had time to make breakfast and get to work on time. Most days I end up oversleeping and sometimes being as much as an hour late for work. And even though I slept late on those days, I would still sputter through the day feeling tired and making poor food choices because I didn't take the time to plan properly. Today, by contrast, I've had more energy than I've had in weeks. It was the win that I needed to motivate me to keep practicing and getting more wins in this area. Ironically, the message this morning on Kenneth Copeland's show was on nutrition and fitness and how as believers we have to be good stewards of our bodies. It's easy to think that the body is just superficial and believe that God is only concerned with our spirit. But we have to remember he put us here to work; actual real physical work. And we need to be in shape and fit to do all that He has called us to do. We're His tools, we've got to be in top working order.
This early morning victory over slothfulness, propelled me to more spiritual victories today. Because my mind was alert and had received the Word early this morning, it was ready for battle when the enemy came at me with a barrage of negative thoughts. I never realized how important being mentally alert is when it comes to battling these attacks. Imagine that you're half sleep or just woke up and someone comes up at punches you. Because of your drowsy state, you'd be totally caught off guard and knocked out. Well, that's how I've been spending so much time. In a drowsy stooper. And when satan would through negative thoughts my way, I'd get knocked out by them because I wasn't alert enough to fight back.
There are so many scriptures in the Bible that tells us to remain alert so that we don't fall into satan's traps, or miss God. In Matthew 13, Jesus talks about staying up and watchful because you don't know when He will return. I'm convinced that you can't be spiritually alert if your physically lethargic. You can be physically at rest and spiritually alert. But to be tired and drowsy your mind is no longer focused on anything spiritual your only thinking about meeting your need for rest. When we're alert we won't be caught off guard, we're ready to use the Word to fight satan rather than getting sucker punched.
Well, I've gotta get my rest, so I can rise, shine and WIN again tomorrow!
Friday, February 25, 2011
keeping P.A.C.E.
I've definitely slipped in my posting. It's been hard to get anything done after class this week. At any rate, here I am with a thought.
A few years back someone told me this acronym: PACE, meaning proper application concentrated effort. Last summer, when I was training for a marathon, I learned a lot about pacing. On a long run, setting the right pace makes all the difference in the world. If you start out going to fast, you'll burn yourself out early. If you go to slowly you don't develop or improve. The key is to find a pace that pushes you and every week turn it up just a notch.
Well, this journey is no different. It's not sprint; I'm set to go the distance. It's so tempting when you decide to go on this journey to want to develop a legalistic regimen of praying for an hour a day and reading a book of the Bible per week, or fasting for x number of days. There's nothing wrong with any of those things. But what I'm learning is there is a difference between being spiritual and being spirit-led.
Being spiritual is at the heart of hypocrisy. It's about putting on a "form of Godliness", doing all the "Christian" things, but when you find yourself just doing things because they seem like they fall in the "what Christians should be doing list", then more than likely you're just being spiritual. When missing something on your list makes you feel like you've let yourself down, then there's a chance that you're not being spirit-led, but being spiritual. Being spiritual, you find yourself telling God what you're going to do and prayer is just your opportunity to fill him in on what's going on.
Being spirit-led is about a relationship with God. It's communication. To be spirit-led you have to quiet yourself and spend time in the presence of God with no agenda, but allow Him to give you an agenda. It's intently listening to God and the leading of Holy Spirit. It's unhurried; it's a walk with your closest friend and most trusted advisor.
It's definitely important to set aside time for prayer and studying your Bible, but what we have to be careful of is how we spend that time. Don't just make it a checklist item, but make each appointment with God significant; be excited about spending time with the King. Also, we can't get to the point where we confine our time with God to a certain block on our calendars, but we must allow God to freely flow through and infiltrate every moment of our day.
I've found myself slipping into a checklist relationship with God. I'm learning to just rest in Him and let Him set the pace for the journey. The only way I can keep the pace is to be spirit-led, rather than rushing around being spiritual.
A few years back someone told me this acronym: PACE, meaning proper application concentrated effort. Last summer, when I was training for a marathon, I learned a lot about pacing. On a long run, setting the right pace makes all the difference in the world. If you start out going to fast, you'll burn yourself out early. If you go to slowly you don't develop or improve. The key is to find a pace that pushes you and every week turn it up just a notch.
Well, this journey is no different. It's not sprint; I'm set to go the distance. It's so tempting when you decide to go on this journey to want to develop a legalistic regimen of praying for an hour a day and reading a book of the Bible per week, or fasting for x number of days. There's nothing wrong with any of those things. But what I'm learning is there is a difference between being spiritual and being spirit-led.
Being spiritual is at the heart of hypocrisy. It's about putting on a "form of Godliness", doing all the "Christian" things, but when you find yourself just doing things because they seem like they fall in the "what Christians should be doing list", then more than likely you're just being spiritual. When missing something on your list makes you feel like you've let yourself down, then there's a chance that you're not being spirit-led, but being spiritual. Being spiritual, you find yourself telling God what you're going to do and prayer is just your opportunity to fill him in on what's going on.
Being spirit-led is about a relationship with God. It's communication. To be spirit-led you have to quiet yourself and spend time in the presence of God with no agenda, but allow Him to give you an agenda. It's intently listening to God and the leading of Holy Spirit. It's unhurried; it's a walk with your closest friend and most trusted advisor.
It's definitely important to set aside time for prayer and studying your Bible, but what we have to be careful of is how we spend that time. Don't just make it a checklist item, but make each appointment with God significant; be excited about spending time with the King. Also, we can't get to the point where we confine our time with God to a certain block on our calendars, but we must allow God to freely flow through and infiltrate every moment of our day.
I've found myself slipping into a checklist relationship with God. I'm learning to just rest in Him and let Him set the pace for the journey. The only way I can keep the pace is to be spirit-led, rather than rushing around being spiritual.
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
a lesson in patience
Wowzers! It's been several days.
Sometimes it seems unbelievable how quickly time passes. Here we are already at the end of February. This weekend I went to the Worth the Wait Revolution Gala. The theme was "The Elegance of Purity", one of the things that all of the panelists echoed was the importance of waiting on God's timing and being content and patient. Like so many of us, I'm impatient and want everything now. When I began this journey 23 days ago, I wanted to have resolved all of my issues in 40 days. It seems like I haven't even identified all of my issues yet, let alone solve them...lol. I can say, God has revealed many of them to me and certain mistakes and temptations I have avoided repeating to God be the glory, but there are still many that I have to get in check.
Now, don't get me wrong, I know that spiritually we are free the moment we receive Jesus, but it takes a bit longer to get the soul (which is our mind, will and emotions) and body to get in line with the spirit. That is the process. Obedience to God certainly helps us along in this process, but nonetheless, even learning to consistently obey the voice of God is a process. You have to train yourself to do it. So, as I take this journey I'm realizing that this journey requires patience. In 1st Corinthians chapter 13, the love chapter, the first characteristic of love is that it is patient.
In Matthew 22:37-40, when asked what the greatest commandment is Jesus replied as follows:
“‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.” So, if the greatest commandments involve loving God, others and yourself, and the first characteristic mentioned about love is patience. Then, what does that infer about the importance of being patient with God, others and yourself?
To me it says, that God knew exactly how impatient we had the potential to be. He knew that we would want to rush Him and His plan for our lives, that we would lose patience with our neighbors, and that we would not even be patient enough with ourselves to allow our minds to be renewed in Him and train our soul to love the way He has commanded. So, He defines love with patience first because He knew if we were ever to truly understand love, we have to understand patience. Think about how God expresses His love for us through patience. Not that our delayed obedience and disobedience is without consequence, but He never forces anything upon us, He patiently lets us make the choice and when we make the wrong choice, God is still there patiently waiting for us to repent and do things His way.
So, wherever you are on your journey remember to just keep focusing on Jesus and walking with Him and you'll stop being concerned with timing and losing patience and will find yourself in God's perfect timing and plan for you.
Sometimes it seems unbelievable how quickly time passes. Here we are already at the end of February. This weekend I went to the Worth the Wait Revolution Gala. The theme was "The Elegance of Purity", one of the things that all of the panelists echoed was the importance of waiting on God's timing and being content and patient. Like so many of us, I'm impatient and want everything now. When I began this journey 23 days ago, I wanted to have resolved all of my issues in 40 days. It seems like I haven't even identified all of my issues yet, let alone solve them...lol. I can say, God has revealed many of them to me and certain mistakes and temptations I have avoided repeating to God be the glory, but there are still many that I have to get in check.
Now, don't get me wrong, I know that spiritually we are free the moment we receive Jesus, but it takes a bit longer to get the soul (which is our mind, will and emotions) and body to get in line with the spirit. That is the process. Obedience to God certainly helps us along in this process, but nonetheless, even learning to consistently obey the voice of God is a process. You have to train yourself to do it. So, as I take this journey I'm realizing that this journey requires patience. In 1st Corinthians chapter 13, the love chapter, the first characteristic of love is that it is patient.
In Matthew 22:37-40, when asked what the greatest commandment is Jesus replied as follows:
“‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.” So, if the greatest commandments involve loving God, others and yourself, and the first characteristic mentioned about love is patience. Then, what does that infer about the importance of being patient with God, others and yourself?
To me it says, that God knew exactly how impatient we had the potential to be. He knew that we would want to rush Him and His plan for our lives, that we would lose patience with our neighbors, and that we would not even be patient enough with ourselves to allow our minds to be renewed in Him and train our soul to love the way He has commanded. So, He defines love with patience first because He knew if we were ever to truly understand love, we have to understand patience. Think about how God expresses His love for us through patience. Not that our delayed obedience and disobedience is without consequence, but He never forces anything upon us, He patiently lets us make the choice and when we make the wrong choice, God is still there patiently waiting for us to repent and do things His way.
So, wherever you are on your journey remember to just keep focusing on Jesus and walking with Him and you'll stop being concerned with timing and losing patience and will find yourself in God's perfect timing and plan for you.
Thursday, February 17, 2011
trust...part 2
Right now, I'm dealing with a situation that is requiring me to trust God completely. Moment by moment I'm having to fight negative thoughts that satan throws in order to make me question God. I'll be honest, it's not easy; mentally, physically and spiritually I'm exhausted. The only way I'm getting through is by depending on God. 2nd Corinthians 12:9-10 says God's strength is made perfect in my weakness.
Today my heart is heavy and it's only by trusting that God is who He says He is and He will do what He says He'll do that keeps me from giving up. I'm learning what it really means to trust God. It means that He has to be #1 in my life. To put anyone else or thing ahead of Him would mean not being able to trust Him completely.
I thank God in advance for the grace to make it through this test and the testimony that will result.
Today my heart is heavy and it's only by trusting that God is who He says He is and He will do what He says He'll do that keeps me from giving up. I'm learning what it really means to trust God. It means that He has to be #1 in my life. To put anyone else or thing ahead of Him would mean not being able to trust Him completely.
I thank God in advance for the grace to make it through this test and the testimony that will result.
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